The grass is always greener on the other side...

I made a new friend online, her life mirrors mine in many ways; left everything behind in the west to move here to India, she is married to a local, the love of her life. She talked about how her in-laws met her at the airport with roses and how her mother in law picks flowers each morning for them to adorn their hair with and I couldn't help but feel a hint of jealousy in the pit of my stomach. Her life sounds so shanti I thought to myself, how did I allow mine to get so far removed from the picture I wanted, the peace that brought me to India in the first place.

Social media has a way of glamorizing our lives, we edit our words, pick the most flattering pictures to post and talk mainly about the sweet stuff. I knew I was just as guilty as others for this but I justified it because I truly am someone who wants to share in love and light, I want to make people smile and shed a little happiness into each day. The people in my feeds that were always complaining I blocked or unfriended, there is enough negativity in the world I choose to use social media as a place of inspiration and sharing positive vibes. Turns out I may be doing a disservice. 

See there are days, days when I've wanted to complain that my mother in law was in a bad mood, again! Or that I'm ready to tear my hair out because my toddlers won't give me a minute of silence. or that my husband hasn't put his phone down in days because he is addicted to candy crush and I feel like taking his phone and throwing it across the room but I haven't written a word about these moments, which has led to others coveting my life.

This illusion we are creating on these sites can lead to a deeper feeling of loneliness. I found a really interesting video that delves deeper into this theory

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Yesterday I got a chance to actually chat with this new friend only to find out her life is not at all as it seems, in fact other than the fact that she is married to the love of her life the rest of it really sucks at the moment. My little world seemed to get brighter as we chatted, not that I took any enjoyment hearing of her hardships or felt superior in any way for having managed Indian culture but just in the reminder that the grass is not always greener. It was a valuable lesson in envy. something I didn't even recognize existed in my world,

I'm meditating surrendering to what is and once again appreciating all that I have, But mostly I want to find balance, I want to be fearlessly authentic, truly real, even when there is an option to edit...